Firsts...

Tomorrow is the first day of school.
My 10 year old is having a rough time. He just flat out does not want to go to school. So, I started thinking about all the first days of school I had and remember, distinctly, feeling the same way.
I hated school....there wasn't one thing in all my years that I enjoyed about it. I remember wishing that I could stay home...it wasn't until later that I learned about homeschooling.

So, now I have to deal with the same thing my parents had to deal with. The belly aches, headaches, toothaches, earaches.....etc. Anything to use as an excuse to stay home where I was most comfortable and felt like I belonged.

I totally understand what my son is going through.

Then, I started thinking of "Firsts"....

After August 15, 2009, we had a whole year of "Firsts" to get through.
Connor's first day of school after Grandpa and Ethan died was filled with changes....
1. Grandpa and Ethan died (which Connor witnessed)
2. Burying two very integral members of our family
3. Connor starting 4th grade at a new school (our district moves kids from elementary to a bigger school beginning in 4th grade)
4. Making the decision to sell our house and move in with Grandma
5. Getting rid of Connor's dog and cat and half of our household
6. September 27, Grandma's first birthday without her soulmate
7. November - First Thanksgiving without Grandpa and Ethan
8. December - First Christmas without Grandpa and Ethan
9. January - First New Year without Grandpa and Ethan......
The list of "Firsts" is endless.

It was a year of "Firsts". Everyone told us..."the firsts are the worst...."
Well, what about the "Seconds"???? As far as I'm concerned, so far the seconds aren't any better.
Tomorrow would have been Ethan's first day as a senior.

See? It's neverending.